Giving Up

What I do understand
is the lies you tell yourself
The honest truth is
the problem has a name
and pretending it doesn’t is the problem
You’ve been loving me the same
like I’m a disappointing realisation
beautiful until the chemicals fade
and your bin cascades
tinkling betrayal on garbage day
Giving up I give nothing more
Giving up you creep away
an absence like last breath
like ash that had a name
Habit became the algorithm
and you became the slave
Outside you loom and waver
a jerking, burning, stinking firefly
The moment seems too short on perks
to deliver the benefit of flight
Keep out keep out
The gate bangs twice
Dignity upheld
the delicate crashing of unseen emotions
skulks behind a suburban fence
I walk onward beneath trees
It’s simpler than oblivion
Here among spinning, falling leaves
the breeze never blows backwards
like memories
They say love heals pain
though mine was never enough
to compete with sensual, unimaginably beautiful vice
I’m inside you and outside you
more than addiction
and so much less
We aren’t so different
except that you crave indifference
I’m inside my house
listening to the news
You talk to ghosts